It’s the 5^th of September and you have eagerly entered the world with absolutely no clue what you were getting yourself in to – after all you have been gently acquiescing to your mother’s needs for 9 months, kicking every so often to assure she and the rest of the world are aware at all hours of your awesome presence even before THE grand entrance (ok, perhaps the whole birthing process is a tad more complicated).

In the eyes of John Locke, we are born with a tabula rasa, otherwise known as a “blank slate” or how our mind functions before imprinting from the outside world.  The age-old debate about how and what shapes our personalities is a contentious one for sure.

After nesting for some time in your mother’s womb, you enter this world called reality. A world where you enthusiastically attempt and re-attempt to tie your shoes at age three and are immediately rewarded with a forgiving smile and unconditional positive regard from loved ones and strangers alike, regardless of how many tries it takes to tie your sparkly little shoes. A world where, when you attempt to try a new skill or meet someone knew as an adult, many times you internalize the belief to get it right the first time or perhaps abandon ship if it does not go as planned repeatedly — the fear of heartbreak, disappointment, expectations, and notorious “should” statements. 

To complicate things, enter our dear and somewhat edgy friend, Tech N. Ology. Can we recall the first time we set hands on our first Nokia that weighed approximately 300 lbs? We had the luxury of calling people outside our homes and to call that device our very own, a feeling of material intimacy. As the life-altering 2019 pandemic hit us, and we isolated for long periods of time, we became increasingly reliant on our screens to connect with others. 

Living in a day and age we all dreamt of where we can message each other freely, connect with others to our liking and convenience, how is it that more and more folks are expressing feelings of discontent and increased distress? We have gone from: the age of wired to wireless, writing letters to e-cards, and having to call to order food to clicking a button for a gourmet meal to our doorstep.

The freedom of choice and immediate gratification is a double-edge sword perhaps.  While we crave and value our sense of autonomy, a clean slate where we desperately seek to control the outcomes of our life stories, there’s a part of us longing to connect with others in a socially meaningful way, a gray area, requiring much trial and error and sitting with sticky unknown.  How do you say we respond the next time we see a stranger on the street tying their shoe?!